why did he stop texting me suddenly

We’d stayed up late, talking over wine, swapping stories about our families. He told me about his parents’ divorce, his mom’s affair, the custody battle when he was a kid. He showed me photos, asked to see mine. It felt like we were letting each other in.

But that morning, everything was different. He got up quickly and said he was going to take a shower. No kiss, no good morning. When he came back, he didn’t offer breakfast like last time. He told me his dad was coming over, that he needed to buy groceries and clean, and that he could call me an Uber.

I said okay. There wasn’t much else to say. When the car arrived, he gave me a quick, unemotional kiss, and I left.

I checked the time when I got home—around 11am. Now it’s almost midnight. Twelve hours. Nothing from him. He’s been online, but I haven’t heard a word.

I keep thinking back, trying to trace where things shifted. Three weeks ago, our first date lasted five hours. We just walked, talked, laughed. No drinks, just us, moving through the city. He kissed me when we said goodbye. Two hours later, he messaged me. After that, we texted every day, sometimes all day.

A couple days later was our second date. We met for a hike—he held my hand the whole way, was so touchy-feely. That night, we went to his place, talked, drank wine, slept together, cuddled. In the morning, he acted distant. It felt like he wanted me to leave, so I did. I wondered if that was all he wanted. But then, just a few hours after I left, he messaged again. The conversation kept going.

He asked me out for a third date, but I had to cancel because I was sick. He offered to change his plans to see me if I felt better, told me we could meet whenever I wanted. We still texted a lot every day. He seemed eager, caring.

Our third date finally happened three days ago. We went for dinner, then to his place again, talked, cuddled, had sex. The next morning, he was sweet, made me breakfast, asked me to stay. I hung around for a couple hours. We went for a walk, holding hands the whole time. When I left, I was sure he really liked me.

Later, I messaged him to ask if he wanted to hike the next day. He answered right away—yes, definitely.

Yesterday, we met for that hike. I could tell right at the start that he was distant. He gave me a kiss, but it didn’t feel enthusiastic. He didn’t take my hand, was quieter than usual. I asked if something was wrong. He said he was just a little hungover.

I didn’t know what to do, so I acted distant too. After the hike, I thought about just going home, but he invited me to his place for dinner. I said yes.

At his place, things seemed to get back to normal. He cooked dinner, we drank wine, got a little drunk. I told him I’d felt he was being distant, wondered if I’d annoyed him or said something wrong. He apologized, said absolutely not, that he’s just a weird person and very independent, needs space. He said that spending two days with me should show that he likes me.

We talked for hours. He opened up about his family, about what happened when he was a kid. We shared photos, asked questions about each other’s lives. It felt close, honest.

But this morning, it was like none of that had happened. He was distant again, rushing around, talking about his dad coming over and needing to clean, offering to call me an Uber.

Now I’m here, waiting, not sure what happened. After a month of daily contact, this silence is new. I keep replaying the moments: the walks, the wine, the hand-holding, the conversations, the cold mornings. I don’t want to message him—I’m too old to chase someone. But I keep wondering if I missed something, if I did something wrong, if he’ll reach out, or if this is it.