how to get over a friendship breakup

She was sitting across from me, her eyes bright, talking about the guy who’d just moved into her building—how he pursued her until she agreed to go out with him. She seemed happy, almost glowing, and spent a lot of time gushing about him.

It wasn’t always like this. For over a decade, we’d been best friends. When she had her breakdown a few years ago, she cut everyone else out, but I stayed. We talked every day. I’d help her sort through her feelings, steer her away from unhealthy thoughts. We got especially close then. Once, I asked if she’d ever think about reaching out to old friends who’d been asking about her. She told me she didn’t think she had the energy to keep up more than one relationship at a time, and even that was hard for her.

Lately, our contact had dwindled. I’d be lucky to get a text from her in a week. I went over to her place because I was worried—worried about her, and about this new guy.

She seemed so happy, talking about him. I told her I was proud of her, that I wanted to see her dating again, but I asked if she could try a little harder to keep in touch.

Her face changed. She got defensive.

“You know what I’m like. Why can’t you just be happy for me?” she said.

Then she accused me of wanting her all to myself, even if it meant she would end up alone. That stung. I reminded her of everything I’d done for her—how I was there for her recovery, how I’d dealt with things this new boyfriend hadn’t even seen.

She flipped out. She screamed at me to leave.

A few hours later, she messaged me. She said she wasn’t going to cut me off, but she didn’t want my help anymore. She’d talk to me when she wanted to, and I would just have to accept it.

Now, our daily contact is gone. Rare texts, if anything. I’m left hurt, not sure what our friendship is anymore, or if it can ever go back to what it was.